I will never understand people who abuse animals and children.

Understand the impulse, the anger? Of course! I have three kids, I was angry enough to hurt them many times…but instead I injured and killed many many wooden spoons on my countertops. My kids knew it was time to settle down and pay attention when I started banging the spoons on the counter like a gavel. Now, I admit that wasn’t the best example I could have given my kids about controlling my temper, but I started young and learned a lot I wish I would have known when they were little.

Understand the actual action? No way. How can you take a hot curling iron and deliberately burn your kid with it — or both of your kids? Especially a baby?

Like I said, if I live to be 100…